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Category Archives: Africa

My little can of beans

27 Oct

So who would have figured that after a most challenging day of doing what I do best in our little existence here in Zeroville, that I would come home to relax, lie on the couch and have my ass kicked? Did you see it coming? I sure as hell didn’t.

So my nice comfortable tight little lid on my little can of beans was ripped from it’s place of false security and my ass was kicked so hard that my beans scattered everywhere for everyone to see. Actually it was an everyone of one! And actually the ass kicking was in the most mind blowing way possible.

How?

If I had to answer 3 seemingly easy questions and instantly failed to do so, my questions would be answered for me. Just as instantly. Answered in a way that no one could. No one has that information. Its my can. They’re my beans! Until now.

Have you ever had your story told to you in bullet points? Its really something else. Especially when the story teller keeps hitting the nail on the head.

How?

Alright, so for now forget the how. Its the reality that counts. I question too much. I analyze. Its in me. I’m a trouble shooter, solution provider and fault finder. I need to stop finding faults and focus on other talents.

Moving forward its time to rub my ass and scoop my beans back together but this time trying to leave the lid off. There are some amazing beans in there that I have to let breathe and soak in some sunshine.

Keep the faith

 
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Posted by on October 27, 2011 in Africa, Hmmm, Hoox... You're such a, Ideas, Life, Random

 

Lost & Found – Cyanide and Happiness

27 Sep

This feels like an average day out here in Zeroville, the land of the Viper. Sometimes you just have to wake up like Tommy the Tank Engine – “I know I can, I know I can!”

signs

 
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Posted by on September 27, 2011 in Africa, L & J, Life

 

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Battered

19 Sep

Oh why does the quality of a weekend party always have to be directly proportional to intensity of the hangover that ensues. Saturday was great, on the outside. Saturday night was not so great, on the inside. Sunday just became a dozy blur of rugby, food, incredible amounts of rehydrating liquids and sleep. Go the Bokke! ZZzzz

This is where most of the damage was done: Pointe Denis

Pointe Denis

 
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Posted by on September 19, 2011 in Africa, L & J, Life, Party!

 

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Where to go on holiday?

16 Sep

Since I’m back in the saddle in the life of a contractor, I am up for vacation for 2 weeks every 2 months. The only downside to this is always having to come up with new and wonderful places to visit. I don’t entirely know where I want to go for my next holiday which is earmarked for roughly mid November. I wanted to go kiteboarding in Dahab, Egypt but an Egyptian mate of mine says it’s probably still not such a good time to venture up there.

What to do? Where to go? Oh woh is me!

Maybe I should just spin a globe and throw a dart! Anyone got a dart for me?

 
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Posted by on September 16, 2011 in Africa, Contract, Holiday, R & R, Travel, World in 80 ways

 

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Trans-Africa

15 Sep

So I came up with a brainwave this week. I want to ride my soon to be collected Yamaha TTR250 across the equator and then down south to South Africa. This became a short lived dream when I saw exactly where the equator runs.

1

Gabon – fine.
Congo – no go!
DRC – no go!
Uganda – ok’ish.
Kenya – awesome!
Somalia – NO GO!

Too many “no go’s”. Guess I’m going to have to find another route home to South Africa.

This is the TTR250 that I was hoping to do it on:

btab

Click for more

 
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Posted by on September 15, 2011 in Africa, Travel, World in 80 ways

 

Another departure lounge

17 Aug

The dumbassness of this place has struck again. Sitting here waiting to get home for a much needed holiday and I’m just shaking my head. To list everything that is winding me up would be no short story. The highlight of this bullshit though is these assholes failure to realise that 24E is not a window seat. So much for SAA’s wonderful online booking management system. Why do they even suggest they are capable of pre-seating?

I guess on the upside though is that the paraffin budgie is here, I have a seat on it and it’s heading in the right direction. Home!

Just a giddy up and go. Off to Seff Effrika.

 
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Posted by on August 17, 2011 in Africa, Rant 'n Rave, Transport

 

A mans freezer

16 Aug

What more does a bloke need in a freezer? Ice and ice cream. Hmmmm! Can’t beat it.
Ok maybe a bottle of vodka would round it off nicely.

- Posted via iPhone

 
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Posted by on August 16, 2011 in Africa, Hmmm

 

Tinterweb is dooon

16 Aug

Just bloody frikkin marveloooos. On day 2 of a 5 day holiday week excluding weekends on both ends (productivity in West Africa you ask?), the damn internet goes down. Call the techies and they say they will get someone on it “as soon as possible”. Thats just lovely but what if it’s only possible next Monday? Celebrate Africa!

Gotta love the iPhone wiff tinterweb data.

Damn good thing I’m flying out of here tomorrow night! Sanity and civilisation here I come. Sort of.

 
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Posted by on August 16, 2011 in Africa, Post by iPhone, Rant 'n Rave, Technology

 

My SA pack up

03 Nov

After sitting at home for a while wondering what the future holds and wishing I was back on the road, I decided that it would probably be better to get back on the road and then wonder which direction I was heading. Any action is better than just sitting on your ass.

It was actually while I was in Durban for Rethom’s birthday looking down over the valleys to the sea when the decision was made. To hell will SA, time to fly. It made perfect sense to head back to Alibanya and go stay with the Flying Majmun, Puccino! Or KP (Klein Puccino) as she has been affectionately known in the past. Decision made, now action.

There wasn’t a lot to do really. Pack house, sell car, buy ticket and fly. I added the rest of the stress myself. What a wonderful idea to redo your entire kitchen with an estimate completion being the day prior departure. Not advised!

Rethom offered some sound advice: Make a list. I hate lists. Lists are for people who plan shit. I don’t plan shit. My shit just happens. I said to her, “I don’t need a list. All I have to do it this, this, this, ummm that, errr this, oh yeah and that…. Oh shit! I need a list!” God I suddenly had so much to do and less than a week to do it!

As a little insert here, there was the mission to sort out regarding Micho, the worlds kewlest cat! But that’s another story.

With the help of a few mates I got it done. All of it. It was incredible. What a buzz.

With the kitchen almost done, all my crap in my house packed into boxes and loaded into a freshly build shed outside, mates ready to move in to take care of the place, car sold and my bags 14kgs over the limit, I was ready to go.

Bye bye Port Elizabeth! Bye bye South Africa! Sort your shit out!

 
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Posted by on November 3, 2009 in Africa, Albania, Europe, South Africa, Travel, World in 80 ways

 

Drivers license update

17 Oct

Ok it was a little while ago now but I never got around to writing anything about it again. As a recap, I had an issue with my drivers license in South Africa. I was overseas when the government converted the license system from a book to a photo card system. Excuse me but I never got that memo.

The end of it was my declaration that the government could go to hell and that would be the end of it. Wrong again. Don’t get me wrong, it can still go to hell but after doing a little investigation it seemed that I was screwed no matter which way I looked at it. So I went back to the Port Elizabeth traffic department and tried to plead my case. “Futile” doesn’t even begin to describe it. I would have had better luck talking to a warm steaming pile of dog turd. Needless to say what I was dreading what verbalized. “”Mr Hoox, you have to redo your entire license. Write your learners test and then do your K53 road test”. It’s no wonder why they have to put bullet proof glass windows at the desks!

In short, with a very special thanks to my friends back in Humansdorp license department, I achieved the impossible. I pleaded my case there on the Wednesday, I wrote my learner’s test on the Thursday, went for 2 hours driving lessons on the Friday and passed my drivers test on the Saturday. Street legal again!

Now  the rest of the f**ckers can eat that warm steaming pile of dog turd!

 
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Posted by on October 17, 2009 in Africa, Government, Rant 'n Rave, Road Trip, South Africa

 
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