Daily Archives: September 17, 2008

I don’t know if it’s just Johannesburg or if the whole country has been hit by lethargic and subsequently abominable service levels. I’m talking about service across the board. Shops, movies, call centres, and the likes. The ones that it are your face blatantly these days are bars and restaurants.

You walk into a place and usually the staff greet you like they are doing you a favour by doing so. Then there’s the “couldn’t really give a toss where you sit” attitude. Once seated, the person who showed you to your table takes your drinks order and then says “I’m not actually your waitress but I’ll pass on the order”. Needless to say, more than a few times, the order comes to the table wrong. It goes downhill from there.

Of course this is a generalization. There are the few and far between places that you do get good service, enjoy some good banter with the staff, and you leave the place with a feel good attitude knowing that you will return. Like I say though, “few and far between”.

Take yesterday for example. I’m out in Midrand and a friend and I decided it would be good to catch a quick pizza and a drink at Primi Piatti. We were in a hurry so we asked the waiter before ordering if it would be ok to rush the food. Of course he says yes. We ordered a garlic bread starter to share and our individual mains explaining that since we are pressed for time he should just bring it all out together. 20 minutes later we get the garlic bread. Hmmmm. 10 minutes later the empty plate gets removed from the table. 30 minutes later (times flies when discussing aviation) I called the waiter over and asked what was taking a pizza and a salad so long to prepare. In all his (lack of) wisdom he declares proudly, “Oh here at Primi we only put the main course in the oven when you are done with your starter so that is remains fresh”. Thank you for reciting the company motto to me! So I very calmly and politely reply, “So what f**king part of “please bring it all out together cos we are in a hurry” did you fail to comprehend? If that was not possible why didn’t you f**king say so when you took the order? We finished the starters 30 minutes ago! We have now been here an hour and have not yet got our food on the table!”

Maybe they were busy so I took a quick scan around the establishment. Nope, we were still the ONLY table in the place. I guess everyone else has figured out how sh!t they are and are not bothering returning for another stress. I certainly wont. We eventually got the food but now it was late, we were out of time, so we threw a bit down our throats and I packed my remains to go. I can’t even tell you if it tasted good or not as by then I had no appetite and I was in a foul mood. Needless to say his tip was not great. R200 bill. R4 tip! He did bring me one drink without a hassle so he got what he deserved!

That was just one example. Go to a pub, any pub, like The Keg or O’Hagens or whatever and see the service for what it is. Ridiculous! Staff just don’t give a rats ass about their customers. When comparing just cast your mind back a few years when you had people in those jobs who cared about what they were doing. I remember how lively the staff in the Spur used to be. Almost fighting other staff to get your food out the best so they would get a good tip. Now a days, you have to scream at any staff member walking past with their fingers in their noses.

I heard a rumour the other day which could possibly explain this. I heard that waiting staff is now considered a professional job so they are all paid salaries and no longer rely on tips. I don’t know how true this is but it makes sense when you go to a bar and get served by 5 different staff members and each one of them screws your order up. There really is NO incentive to get anything right and make your stay in the place a pleasant one. But if this is the case then we shouldn’t be expected to tip anymore? Right? Why should we? I did a job, earned a salary and I didn’t get a tip on completion whether I screwed it up or not.

Tipping in this country is a given, an expected part of your bill. I say to hell with that. Let’s get back to what it was in the first place, a GRATUITY, a bonus for doing a great job. “Keep up the good work”. Now you are paying exorbitant prices when going out, getting sh!t service, and still tipping on top of that? Why should the staff care? It’s not their bar, they are still getting a salary and idiots like us are still tipping. No more!

I also feel that the responsibility lies with the managers. They are responsible for the staff. So MANAGE your staff you lazy bastards! Either they are hiring the wrong people for the job, are not training their people properly, or just don’t care anymore. The only time you get good service is when you go to the places where the owners are there and interacting with everyone. They are very quick to put their staff in line with a swift kick to the attitude!

From here on I will only tip for service that deserves a tip. The only way service levels are going to improve is if you hit these lazy bastards where it hurts. In their wallets! Now I can go through life here and just be the only tight ass refusing to give a tip, or the rest of the country can join in and make something change.

On the other hand, we could all just become as lethargic and as pathetic as the service industry. Since we are fast joining the rest of Africa, why should we bother? Isn’t it all about racism, corruption and crime anyway?

Good luck South Africa!

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