Sometimes this place feels like hell.
“I’m a nobody, get me out of here”
I know I come across as quite negative about a lot of sh!t but that’s only because there is a lot of negative sh!t to come across about. It’s nothing really major. There’s no one thing so far that has made me want to jack this place in and blow this popcorn stand. It’s a multitude of really irritating little things that build up over time until one day you realise you are about to go Charles Manson on the place.
Take my hotel for instance. I have been living in that pokey room since the 13th of February and I’m about to go banjo! I really miss the opportunity to fall asleep on the sofa watching crappy TV on a Saturday afternoon. The room has two electrical wall sockets in very inconvenient places so I have to keep swapping stuff and stretching cables. It’s a twin room. Two single beds. I prefer a double. It has a stupid mini bar which obviously costs the earth as they do. I even had to buy my own kettle and water to make pot noodles (bachelor gourmet). Now this is what really got me yesterday. I have been a resident of this dump for almost three months and last night when I went to gym (no comments smart asses) which they advertise being part of their facilities, I was told that I now have to pay for a gym membership. €50 per month. It’s probably not a lot of money as gym rates go (I wouldn’t know) but what about the principle? I very calmly questioned the reason for this and I was told that it was the hotel director that has introduced this since we are long term residents and have favourable rates. I was proud of myself since I didn’t spark at the messenger and I simply said, “Thank you, I will take this up with him in the morning” and proceeded to work out and use the sauna. I asked for the director this morning but he wasn’t available. Let’s see if he calls me as per the polite message I left for him. So far, nothing. Wanker!
Work is getting to me as well now. I am due R&R soon but we still don’t know when we are supposed to be moving to the camp of Reps. There are too many conflicting stories. The guy responsible for building the camp is saying that it’s ready for us to relocate but everyone that visits returns with completely different views. To be honest, I don’t really give a monkey’s ass when we go but I would merely appreciate a fixed sensible realistic date so I can plan accordingly. Since the idea is that we could move in a week, I cannot go on holiday that I’m due as I have to be here for the move. If this does drag out now until the end of May then I’m screwed. I won’t be able to go on holiday for at least 3 weeks after the move while dealing with teething problems which are likely to occur. So the way I see it now is, I am going to be here for 17-18 weeks without a break. If someone would just make the call and admit that we will not move until the end of May then I can go on my R&R before then.
I’m doing my head in and not even the beer is making it go away at night! Need whiskey! Damn, I don’t drink whisky. Need vodka and rum!
It sounds rough! It’s for the best that I don’t find myself in situations like that…I have no tact…none. I’d cause an international incident and be deported or something.
I think I’m being deported. I’m searching for tact. Fcuk it it, as long as you have red PP ,….Nooo not Pee Pee (cos that met require cream). Help
Are you okay?
Did you do something bad? Hope you’re OK….
Oh my God Im really sorry. I was very drunk and am now trying to make sense of what I wrote. Too much vodka and rum and beer and tequila. Damn I should never drink tequila. And I should lock up my laptop if Im going drinking.
The red PP I was referring to I think is my British Passport but I have no idea why in that context. And I think I can only wish that I get deported. It seems you cant even get paroled out this place.
Im feeling much better now. Thanks for your concern. Im not in trouble just yet.
Hehe…well, just glad to see you’re okay now.
Hope your hangover is not too severe?
Where the heck did the tequila come from in the first place?? I saw no previous mention.
Well Snavy, I never PLANNED the tequila! No one ever PLANS tequila. That would just be silly. They sort of come out of the woodwork halfway through the night and blindside you an hour later. Check out the party advice:
http://offthehoox.com/2007/05/01/mixing-alcohol/
I’m never drinking tequila again and this time I mean it!
Uh-huh Whatever you say HooX
If I had a shooter for every time I’ve swarn off tequila I’d be drunk already…
Right, but have you ever had a Tequila Stuntman?
Sniff the salt
Drink the tequila
Squirt the lemon in your eye
Hahaha! No I haven’t…Only the normal type in shooter glasses or straight from the bottle, slammers and sunrises, also I think some it once lurked in a particularly nasty B’day drink. Sheesh! Notice everything tequila-ish has a second word starting with “S”? Shooter, Stuntman, Sunrise, Slammer
Is the lemon in the eye so that you don’t see the others coming?
Does it hurt much? Maybe I’ll just have to try it… (For the completeness of history and all that).
It’s because tequila is “S”hit!!!
I will try to describe the experience
As soon as you snort the salt your nasal passage revolts and tries to clear the sodium chloride by instantly washing it out.
When you drink the tequila you still have the “UG UGG” gag sensation but its worse now because you dont have the bitter salt taste to distract you from the aweful taste of the tequila.
Now imagine pouring acid in your eye. You dont really have to imagine too much as it IS acid.
You can see someone who has just done a TSM. He is screaming, clutching one eye with his face twisted and gagging and nose pissing like a racehorse. You can see an idiot who doesn’t learn since he will be clutching both eyes, now blind, whining like a bitch and bubbling from both nostrils.
They are great fun! A real party trick! I wish you luck. Take photos! Share photos!
Wiki really does have it all:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tequila_stuntman
It sounds like “fun” - Is this what you were up to? no wonder you wrote nonsense…Hahahaha! Shame…poor baby. Are you okay now?
I’m guessing that only extremely drunk people attempt this stunt.
Starting to think that perhaps the better thing to do would be to continue avoiding this particular “S”, if Wiki don’t have pictures of it it must get really nasty?