RSS

Monthly Archives: July 2006

To infinity and beyond – 3 weeks

rr.JPG

I am absolutely ecstatic to advise that after a long and arduous journey through time and space here in Camp Badgag, in accordance with the rotational nature of my contract, the time allocated to me has eventually arrived and therefore is time for me to venture forth on a vacation trip to facilitate Rest & Recuperation.

In English : WHOO HOOOOOOO – I’m getting the f*ck out of Dodge and going on holiday.

I will be away for just short of 3 weeks officially. It may however be possible from time to time to connect and add to my daily waffle.

Leaving Badgag, as an exciting a time as it is, is by no means an easy task and usually sees us sitting in a dust-bowel desert military base with the endless unforgiving heat beating us into submission while we miss flight after flight as they are fully booked with enlisted servicemen who rightfully get preferential seating. Bring on Kuwait with it’s hotel and refreshing pools and comfortable beds, however alas, no alcohol. After a trip in from Badgag there would be nothing more refreshng than an ICY cold beer in a frosted glass. Damn Im just torturing myself now! Hold thumbs. Getting home should take me no longer than 4 days!

If I am not able to make contact before my return, then I will now wish you all health, wealth and happiness for the next few weeks. I will be relocating to BarsRad on my return. I will come back with holiday pics and wonderful stories of Lanzarote and London. Travel travel travel – that’s what it’s all about!

Take care and God speed!

Catch you on the flip side!

Ps. Baby, Im on my way!!! Have a safe trip in from SA! See you at Heathrow at 6:30am for a kiss and a coffee?

 
2 Comments

Posted by on July 18, 2006 in Badgag, R & R

 

49 – 0? WTF?

tri_nations.jpg

I’m not entirely sure what to say. First of all I was quite embarrassed to have to admit that I must be the ONLY South African that didn’t know the Tri-Nations had started. My only excuse is being one of the very few antipodeans left in my camp in Badgag. Thank you very much for the heads up people. Now I look like a plonker! I mean, now I look like more of a plonker! However, no matter where in the world you are, out from the woodwork or from under a rock, will crawl a gloating Aussie to remind you. Isn’t it amazing that Aussies only support their international sports (Rugby and Cricket) when they are winning? You ask them about the world record status in cricket that South Africa achieved scoring 438 in an ODI and they will claim to not follow the sport as life starts and stops with Aussie Rules Footie. They weren’t saying that at lunchtime on 12 March 2006 however.

Anyway, back to the game at hand. I am pleased to say that I wasn’t able to watch the humiliation live and I only had to deal with the onslaught of laughter and mockery that any team that has just been savagely brutalized has to endure. And that was coming from the Scottish! I had a glimmer of hope thinking that if I hadn’t heard about it that perhaps the Aussies hadn’t heard either. No such luck! They are all lifetime hardened Rugby Union fans now!

I cannot get access to any footage so I have to rely on reports in from SA. Apparently an extremely dismal performance was put on by our boys! I’m in deep search of a positive outlook in this one and the closest I can get to one is, “at least we have room for improvement”! If that was our best game and we got thumped like that it would have all been over. Hopefully in true Springbok style, we could have caught a wakeup call and will actually feature against the All Blacks next weekend. Lets hope we turn out to be the dark horse underdog that will come back with a vengeance to nab the trophy. Oh and come on NZ, punish those Wallabies like we couldn’t and hold that Bledisloe high!

 
6 Comments

Posted by on July 16, 2006 in Hmmm, Tri Nations

 

Eureka – I have found it!

lanzarotees.jpg

After minutes, hours, days and even weeks of pain, blood, sweat and tears, I eventually found a place to go on a romantic getaway vacation with my lovely girlfriend. I mentioned earlier that I was being a touch fussy in what I expected from this holiday destination. Well, we got it all and more. Villas are the way to go! Thanks to http://myholidayproperty.com/ Check this out:

Full Description: 3 Bedroom 3 Bathroom villa with private pool and Jacuzzi in popular holiday destination in Lanzarote. Set in Costa Teguise with sea views and five mins. walk to the nearest beach. Close to all amenities. This light and airy villa is fully equipped with satellite TV. and PS2 for the whole family to enjoy!! All rooms equiped with ceiling fans to keep you cool during hot summer nights!!

Home Features

  • Sea View
  • BBQ
  • Dishwasher
  • Gardens
  • Microwave
  • Oven
  • Patio
  • Private Pool
  • Safe
  • Satellite TV
  • Washer/Dryer

Only 7 days to wait!!! :-D

 
Leave a comment

Posted by on July 15, 2006 in World in 80 ways

 

The Calgary Stampede

Its that time of year in Canada again!! About as much fun as you can have with your boots on! And its all happening right now! Yahhoooo! The Calgary Stampede

 cstamp.jpg

July 7 – 16, 2006

Its all about cowgirls, cowboys, rodeos, Stetsons and boot-skootin’ madness. Days of fun with all kinds of live shows to be enjoyed. There’s band in bars, comics on stage, exhibitions, horse shows, farm stalls, fun rides and competitions but to name just a few!

The city of Calgary comes alive this time of year with businesses sponsoring breakfast so you can eat for free on the way to the show. There’s action bar entertainment everywhere you turn and loads of cowgirls just dying to serve you a drink or two! Check out Cowboys Dance Hall & Nightclub, the famous brandname bar in the city. Its truly is synonymous with the Stampede.

If you EVER get the chance, do it, GO, just once, at least! You will never be sorry you did!!!

 
Leave a comment

Posted by on July 13, 2006 in L & J, Party!, World in 80 ways

 

Sleep

Sleep. What a wonderful thing. I think that’s the best time of my day. Those moments when you are lying in bed, not too hot, not too cold, just right, under the most comfortable duvet. When you are so tired cos you havent slept in days. You get this little grin on your face cos you know you are about to slip away into dreamland…. ahhhhh a little piece of heaven…

*&^$$!@^*%$@ BANG!!!! And you are awake!!! So much for that. I guess our nextdoor neighbours have better ideas for my sleep patterns. All part of the package I guess. I can’t exactly call reception and ask them to keep it down now can I?

Things that go bump in the night

Should not really give one a fright

It’s the hole in each ear that lets in the fear

That and the absence of light

My guess is Spike Milligan didn’t live in Badgag.

Im going to try this again…. Goodnight.

 
1 Comment

Posted by on July 12, 2006 in Badgag

 

Pet Hates

screambmp.jpgscream.jpgscreambmp.jpgscream.jpgscreambmp.jpg 

As you know, there are those things that that just make you downright crazy. They get under your skin and down to your core. These things that make you go, “why? why?? WHY???”. These are the things that will eventually drive you insane, drive you to drink, have you sent to anger management classes or much worse, make you go Colombine on your mates!

Everyone has them and here are some of mine in no particular order:

  • Cigarette butts in a toilet or urinal – WHY? It only blocks everything up and creates a river or dam of piss for everyone else. Use an ashtray. Why do you feel the need to smoke while going? Relaxing?
  • Bad drivers complaining about other bad drivers – Like you have ANY right to bitch. Sort your own shit out first. Learn how to drive before pointing fingers!
  • People who don’t listen – Why come and ask me a question about things I’m paid to know about and then waste an hour of my time arguing with me when you don’t like the answer?
  • People who don’t listen II – “There’s no such thing as a stupid question”; except when it’s asked by the same person 20 times! Don’t ignore the 1st explanation, it’s not likely to change over time.
  • MSN (IM) Nudges!!! – OMG! WHAT??? It’s virtual poking for attention. Nudge Nudge Nudge Nudge. In reality you would get, “Poke me again asshole and I’ll rip that damn finger right off your hand!”
  • Lastminute.com – “Holiday X” from £399. Click, hmmm, £550 on the day you need. Click, hmmm £750 for your airport. Click, hmmm 25% extra fuel surcharge. Low cost bullshit.
  • HSBC Telephone banking – Once you are completed with all your transactions they say, “& thank you for calling the HSBC”. Right!!! Who else do they think I’m going to call to sort out my HSBC banking requirements? McDonalds?
  • People who bitch and make lists of pet hates – DOH!!!

When everything gets a little much, take a few deep breaths and – Think of a happy place…..

bliss.jpg

 
2 Comments

Posted by on July 11, 2006 in Rant 'n Rave

 

So long Blue Star

blue-star.JPG

Tonight we say to goodbye to Blue Star, our little bar away from the bar. You may recall a much earlier post “Fancy a beer??“, well that was the Blue Star. Our little retreat away from the norm. Actually it’s not so much the bar that we are saying farewell to as its staying put, we are saying farewell to reason behind going there. Tonight is the last night of the last of the “get out and do shit” people who frequented our lovely establishment for fun, sun, sandbags, palm trees, beer and Black Hawks. Tomorrow we say goodbye to two more great people: Lillypot K and JP “The aging rocker”. Tomorrow they get to sign out for the last time and sign into military transport as “End of tour”. Lillipot, thank you for all the laughs, cookies, etc and especially all your help sorting my sorry ass out and getting my shit sorted. And JP, thank you also for all the good times in both of our wonderful locations. Thanks very much too for helping me sort out my g-string. :-) EADGBE.

Take care, safe journey. “All my bags are packed Im ready to go…….”

So long Blue Star

 
Leave a comment

Posted by on July 10, 2006 in Badgag

 

Proudly South African

 sa-flag.jpg  696-1843-0-0_146918.jpgsafrica_flag.jpg

I am absolutely flabbergasted! Many people will agree when I say it takes a lot to leave me speechless but I must say today I’m dumb-struck! I have just been shown a website which even linking to it gives it life it doesn’t deserve but which I will add against my better judgement just so that people can see it to believe it. Crime Expo SA. There are many statements made on this site which are completely unsubstantiated (I will accept proof from a legitimate source) statistics based on what? It’s a very sad day indeed when some mindless, senseless individual(s) can make it their life goal to act against a country for some personal vendetta. Who is (are) this person (people) hiding behind a website? WHO CARES? My point is not to expose the mind, my point is to expose the fear and hatred the mindlessness is spreading. In order to have my view on this I needed to study all the angles but I’m struggling to understand the purpose of this thoughtless act. What gain does it serve? Save the world from the big bad South Africa? Help the people of South Africa? Or merely stand as a soap-box parade for a clearly disturbed individual(s)? I take pity on this person that has possibly been affected by an act of violence. This however does not give grounds for or condone this style of retaliation thus worsening the situation for everyone.

What kind of comments are these? (Quoted from the site)

  • Leave your grandmother at home as she will be killed with a hammer.
  • Leave your mobile phone at home as you could be killed for it.
  • Keep away from combi-taxis as taxi operators shoot at each other.

They are almost as pathetic as a “statistic” I read in a men’s magazine when travelling in California 5 years ago: “The life expectancy of a tourist in South Africa is 11.5 minutes”. I don’t know what’s worse, the fact they publish this garbage misinformation or the fact that there are people gullible enough to read it! Good news doesn’t sell newspapers. You have just joined the alliance of the insanely naïve. “It must be true cos I read it on the internet”.

He is almost bragging that he has saved some tourists from a certain death. A large (gutless) tourist website in Sweden states that it has allegedly “made us think twice” about tours to South Africa based on half truths this person spreads. Do your own homework Sunseekers & congratulations big man you just perpetuated the vicious circle. Every 8 tourists into SA creates one job! Every job less creates one more homeless individual or perhaps even a homeless family. You are pushing people out onto the street to fend for themselves. “You are taking away their livelihood, and breeding more poverty, hate, resentment and crime“. Put yourself in that position briefly while you are looking down from your pulpit. How would you feed your children? How do you survive? In IR@Q there is scary truth: “What’s the difference between an honest hardworking individual and a suicide bomber? Answer – $5000”. Desperate times call for desperate measures. As much as I loath and despise crime, taking a step back from my reality and placing myself in theirs for a moment can bring a level of understanding. Try it. Survival is mankind’s fiercest instinct. You are, in an indirect way, creating the problem you lobby so strongly against.

Before it is said, I will agree, I don’t know you, I don’t know what you have been through, and I don’t understand your loss or your worries (I do hope this isn’t just some unprovoked tirade to hear your own voice). And yes I will agree that crime is a problem in South Africa but I also believe that it is a problem that everyone should tackle and not just point fingers and be judge, jury and executioner on the tourist industry and people of South Africa. What I can ask though is why don’t you focus your energy on becoming part of the solution and quit being part of the problem? Spread the word through South Africa. Make it known how you feel in a way that has a positive outcome. Your hatred for the most beautiful country on earth is only going to create unnecessary fear and assist in tearing it apart! There is still a huge % of the world’s population that doesn’t even know where South Africa is. The World Cup 2010 will change that and make SA a proud nation once more (remember the Rugby World Cup ’95 and Cricket World Cup ’03). However, if you have your way, it will stay the feared unknown and that will seal our fate. Be a bigger and better person than that and stop being such a one sided bigot. Open your comment section to ALL views, not just the right wing extremists who support your blinkered opinion.

I tip my hat to Addy from Cape Town who has had an unbelievable response in support of his blog. PLEASE support him and everyone else that still believes. Have your say. We need more people like that to spread an unbiased view on life in SA! Kudos to you bud! Keep the ball rolling! Stay in touch!

K.T. – “No one is by any means saying that we are perfect. We are a country in a process. We have the most advanced bill of rights and have conjured up inspirational ways to heal, like the truth and reconciliation council, which is such an advanced way of thinking that even other countries like IR@Q are following suite”.

Looking at this with a brighter persepctive, perhaps South Africa should be thanking you. Thanking you for stirring up dormant emotions in people that do actually have faith in their country and who are prepared to speak up against people or organisations like yourselves.

 
110 Comments

Posted by on July 8, 2006 in Life, Rant 'n Rave

 

Tags:

Bush Telegraph – Not GW

Laduma – YYaayy! Is the World Cup over? I think it must be. I think I’m quite astute when it comes to being in the know and getting a feel for circumstances and current events. I keep a finger on the pulse, an ear to the ground most of the time. Well that’s when I don’t have my head stuck to a satellite dish. Is that dangerous? Is the signal harmful? Will my kids have big ears now? Poor little blighters. Anyway, so I’m guessing that the World Cup must be over as suddenly there is no talk about it. I did however overhear an Englishman say “hmmm you remember the final back in 1966?”. He is security so we dont tease - to his face – often. So now we only have another 4 short years before the WC comes to Mother Africa! Even though we will be drinking Budweiser in a Castle Tavern. Too bad, too sad, byebye Castle. Come on SA – Wake up!

News just in. Its Friday which means that its the weekend back in the English speaking world. Its also weekend in the American speaking world. Have a drink for me. Out here, today was “weekend” and today was another Groundhog Day. That does however bring me one day closer (T minus 14 days) to the day that I depart these shores / desert for R&R (Rest and Recoup) for 2 weeks. Now do you think I have found a place to go yet?? HUH?? HELL NO!!! I decided I really am being fussy. Actually is was more of a brutal realisation. Help me out here. Wanted: Nice apartment or room with a balcony overlooking the sea to hear waves crashing in a not too hot climate and somwhere thats not in the UK or that is riddled with beer swilling lager lout Englishmen… Too fussy? Im sure! Oh at the week that I need is teh first week of European school holidays… GREAT!

More news just in. Im absolutely stuffed… again, and need to hit the sack… again. Groundhog day starts… again… in 1 hour 40 mins. Goodie!

I bid you all farewell, a pleasant night and a rip roaring kick ass weekend. DO share what you got up to. I’ll show you mine if you show me yours.

 
Leave a comment

Posted by on July 7, 2006 in World Cup

 

Man ‘breaks’ his willy – (N.W.R.)

If you are a bloke, try and tell me you don’t cringe at the thought of this???

Man ‘breaks’ his willy - new24.com

London – Adam Shaw was having a “quickie” with his wife Niki when he fell out of bed and screamed in agony, reported ananova.com.Niki, 31, grabbed a bag of frozen peas to ease the swelling as Adam’s manhood ballooned to the size of a cucumber – and his testicles to the size of a coconut.

He was rushed to hospital where doctors told him: “It’s broken”. He had an operation to mend the injured organ reports The Sun.

Adam from Camborne, Cornwall said: “I never knew you could break it – but I found out the hard way. It was agony.” Niki added: “He’ll just have to be a little less energetic in future.”

 
1 Comment

Posted by on July 7, 2006 in N.W.R.

 
 
Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.